Archive for the ‘Parenting’ Category
Tuesday, May 26th, 2009
It’s not the first time I’ve heard someone say that about a parent who doesn’t allow their child(ren) to read this or that latest book/series. Some even go as far as finding ways to encourage or help a child/teenager to read the forbidden subject matter in secret. Thus undermining the God given authority of the parent(s) and supporting the child in rebellion and disobedience.
“Bucklands Complete Book of Witchcraft” is also “just a book” , would you want your child reading it? So that one is pretty obviously off the recommended reading list, but these others over here are okay? After all they are just harmless fun and a pretty good read. You only have the right to make that choice for yourself and those under your authority. You cannot make it for another person or their family.
We have a clear duty at Parents:
De 6:7 And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.
De 11:19 And ye shall teach them your children, speaking of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.
Pr 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
Tit 2:1-8 ¶ But speak thou the things which become sound doctrine: That the aged men be sober, grave, temperate, sound in faith, in charity, in patience. The aged women likewise, that [they be] in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, [To be] discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. Young men likewise exhort to be sober minded. In all things shewing thyself a pattern of good works: in doctrine [shewing] uncorruptness, gravity, sincerity, Sound speech, that cannot be condemned; that he that is of the contrary part may be ashamed, having no evil thing to say of you.
And Children are to Obey and Honor:
Pr 1:8 My son, hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother:
Pr 6:20 ¶ My son, keep thy father’s commandment, and forsake not the law of thy mother:
Eph 6:1 ¶ Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.
Col 3:20 Children, obey [your] parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord.
Ex 20:12 ¶ Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.
De 5:16 Honour thy father and thy mother, as the LORD thy God hath commanded thee; that thy days may be prolonged, and that it may go well with thee, in the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.
Eph 6:2 Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;)
Mal 1:6 ¶ A son honoureth [his] father, and a servant his master: if then I [be] a father, where [is] mine honour? and if I [be] a master, where [is] my fear? saith the LORD of hosts unto you, O priests, that despise my name. And ye say, Wherein have we despised thy name?
As long as that child lives in the house of his/her parents and under their authority the parents have every right to decide what they want influencing his/her mind and thoughts while they are still grounding him/her in his/her faith and God’s commandments.
Just as you don’t get between a husband and wife, you don’t get between a parent and a child. Even if you don’t agree with them it is no one’s business. If anything by not allowing certain books to be read in their home they are attempting to keep him/her away from things that might influence his/her mind away from God. “Just a book” has been the path into witchcraft and other forms of problems for many a young person. Young Christians included.
Real Love is tough – Real Love thinks first of the concern for the spiritual and eternal welfare of the child(ren) the parents are blessed with to bring up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. It thinks beyond the temporary and fleeting of popular entertainment. It is the right of the parent(s) to use the discipline they choose and govern as they wish over the child(ren) in their home.
When a child becomes an adult and no longer the parent’s responsibility then they have the right to choose their own entertainment. Hopefully by that time they will be grounded enough in their faith to make wise choices and it will not influence or turn them from God.
Some further food for thought:
That they may teach the young women to be sober: young women, especially conversing amongst heathens, are prone to be light and airy, and over frolicsome, following the heat of their youthful temper, and forming their converse after the manner of others; which is a behaviour, though it may suit their youth, yet if they be Christians it will not suit their profession, which calls to them for more gravity: speak to them that are aged to mind them to be sober. – Matthew Poole
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Thursday, November 27th, 2008
As if the use of plastic bottles and leaching of chemicals into the formula wasn’t scary enough, now you have to worry about the formula itself:
FDA finds traces of melamine in US infant formula
ETA: Follow up in USAtoday on it.
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Monday, October 27th, 2008
We recently took a plane trip. Our son finally outgrew the booster car seat requirements so we’re traveling without having to bring along a car seat or rent one once at our destination. In addition some airlines are starting to charge for checked bags. So we figured it was time to give this “one bag” thing a try.
As we were each allowed one carry-on bag and one personal item that gave us a total of 6 bags and whatever we were wearing.
How did it work out?
We went right up to the self check-in. Didn’t have to wait in long lines or for someone behind the desk to check-in our bags. Got through the security lines easily and quickly. Our bags were easy to travel with in the airports between flights and store in the overhead bins on the planes.
When we landed on the other side we breezed right past baggage claim (no waiting for our bags, no lost bags, and no broken wheel at the last minute!) and right onto a bus to the rental car. (No lugging luggage to the bus stop, onto the bus, off of the bus…)
On the return the same thing. No dropping someone off with the bags and then returning the car or lugging all the bags with you on a bus and then through the terminal.
I have to say that the idea at first was daunting. Is it possible for me to fit everything I might need into one bag and a purse? What about keeping an active 9 year old boy busy and in clean clothing? By paring it down to the NEEDS (and a few wants) it was.
After the ease of our last trip. The lack of luggage mishaps or losing time waiting. I have to say we’re now a ONE BAG ALL THE WAY family!
How did we do it?
Cargo Pants, vests, jackets, anything with pockets is a good clothing item for travel. It gives you an “extra hand” for things you might want without having to dig in a bag for it. Or to just hold a water bottle for a minute.
Get a carry-on bag that is SURE to fit in those small overhead compartments and a personal item bag that will fit in the seat in front of you. I don’t know how many people we saw trying to shove bags that were clearly too large for either and some ended up having to “check” their carry on. At a charge no less.
After culling what we WANTED to pack we we got our items down to what we DID pack: Trial sized personal items in a 1 quart size bag (If you don’t have trial sized items already as freebies or have your favorites in reusable containers, just buy them after you get there (or use the hotel’s) and save yourself the screening.), clothing for 2-3 days (you’re wearing one day’s set.), a laptop, and cables/chargers (a few toys, an inflatable pillow and a blanket – I don’t like using airline ones). And a ”personal item” bag that had our entertainment (games, books, magazines, MP3 players, etc) and snacks.
Layer your clothing on the bottom of your carry-on, cables and other items in a row on top of that, and put your heavier/bigger clothing in a layer over that. I put my laptop in a neoprene sleeve on the top of all that. You can pull the whole sleeve out and place it in the bin to be screened.
For a 5 day trip we imposed on family once to wash our laundry. If you’re not visiting family you could find a laundry mat, use the hotel facilities if they have them, or go all the way with sink washing and drying in your hotel. Think clothing that all goes well together and travels well. There are places that sell travel clothing, but unless you travel a lot probably not worth the investment.
I was very surprised that I didn’t miss anything I didn’t bring with us. Anything we might have needed we could get at a local Walgreens or Walmart. (So long as you’re traveling in the USA.) So it really was a lot less stress on the trip having one less thing to worry about and is something we’re going to be doing from now on. I highly suggest giving it a try.
What have you got to lose? Well, certainly not your luggage!
Links:
TSA: What to Know Before you go. Permitted and Prohibited items.
Onebag.com.
Airline Luggage Allowance Policies.
How to Prevent Lost Luggage and travel tips.
Unclaimed Baggage.
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Tuesday, October 7th, 2008
You know when you get pregnant everyone is so excited and happy for you. Everyone has advice and there are books upon books telling you what to expect when expecting…but when something goes wrong and you’re told you’re going to miscarry there isn’t a lot out there. There are the few people who offer to help with whatever you need, the ones that don’t say anything for fear it will be the wrong thing, and the ones that do say the wrong things.
We found out the end of January, that after 8 1/2 years of infertility and waiting, we were expecting our 2nd child. A few weeks later we were told that the pregnancy wasn’t looking good. Two weeks after that we lost our precious baby. We named him Asher Zechariah which means “Blessed Remembrance of God.”
Today would have been our due date. In remembrance of Asher and the hope he brought not only us, but many other women we know struggling with infertility I thought I’d share some of the things that helped us at the time of our miscarriage and in the months since. (I give a lot of links and I don’t agree with everything on them, but they have good information or items that make it worth the sharing.)
We’re thankful to have good friends, and people we barely know, who have been a blessing. The kind words, the food, the gifts, the cards, the flowers, and all the many prayers have helped us through this difficult time. Thankfully the “helpful” comments that unintentionally hurt were few and for the most part on days when I could let it roll off.
These two links have very good advice and ideas for helping someone you know through a loss. They are things people did for us said to us that were comforting:
Good support is important. While it isn’t talked about much in common conversation around 1 in 4 pregnancies ends in miscarriage. It’s pretty likely some you know in their reproductive years has had one. Having someone to ask “what to expect” questions who has been there and knows what you’re going through is helpful. I found my doctors to be very clinical and not very helpful when it came to this big scary unknown. There are several places you can find support. I only personally have experience with:
Hannah’s Prayer.
Also a good site, because there is a possibility of being misdiagnosed is:
The Misdiagnosed Miscarriage.
More information I found helpful during our wait, miscarriage, and months after our loss:
Facts about Miscarriage.
Mourning a Miscarriage.
When your family has lost a loved one.
Conceiving AFTER Miscarriage. (Men and women’s perspectives)
For myself, and others that I know, having something to remember our baby by can be comforting:
A scrapbook with mementos/pictures to remember your loved one.
A memorial garden.
A special teddy bear. (Build-a-Bear has some birthstone bears – if you have suffered a loss I suggest ordering online rather than going in to make one.)
Birthstone/Memorial Jewelry (Gifts to Remember, My Forever Child, and The Comfort Company had some nice looking items, just to name a few I saw.)
A few songs I found comforting:
Through the Fire by The Crabb Family
Farther Along by Anonymous
Because He Lives by William J. Gaither
Precious Memories & More (A listing of poems, some are good. “Men Don’t Cry” is a very good one reminding us that it is a FAMILY that grieves the loss of a child, not just the woman.)
I’ll end here with my three favorite selections out of the many verses in the Bible that gave/give me comfort.
Jeremiah 1:5 Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations.
1 Samuel 1:27-28 For this child I prayed; and the LORD hath given me my petition which I asked of him: Therefore also I have lent him to the LORD; as long as he liveth he shall be lent to the LORD. And he worshipped the LORD there.
Matthew 5:4 Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.
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Friday, July 25th, 2008
A few myths that were going around 10 years ago and that are still going around today:
I have inverted nipples so I couldn’t.
http://www.breastfeed-essentials.com/invertednipples.html - Women BREASTfeed, not NIPPLEfeed. With knowledge and help most women can go on to breastfeed and many do. For some the problem corrects itself as the pregnancy progresses and for other there are things you can do while still pregnant to prepare for breastfeeding when the baby is born. http://www.breastfeeding.org/articles/beforebaby.html
I got sick so I couldn’t.
http://www.kellymom.com/health/illness/mom-illness.html - Short of a few serious illnesses you can and should continue to breastfeed. Your milk won’t make the baby sick, BUT it does give him antibodies to your cold/flu etc. Just be sure any medications you may take are safe while breastfeeding.
I didn’t have enough milk/a little supplementing won’t hurt/he only wanted a bottle.
http://www.kidsnutrition.org/consumer/archives/supply.htm
http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/bf/supppit.asp
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/2/t023200.asp - Most people don’t understand the system of supply and demand. (Just look at the debt issues in our country today…) Breastfeeding is very much a matter of supply and demand… or actually baby demands and your body supplies! When you introduce bottles the demand on you falls and your body gets the message and your supply drops. Continue this trend and soon you’re not making enough.
Yeah, I know some people do fall into the small minority of women that are UNABLE to breastfeed because of a real problem. But, the majority of those that I’ve seen that have claimed an “inability” to breastfeed were because of a failure to seek out/be provided knowledge and support, not a failure of their body.
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Sunday, July 20th, 2008
You know it has been almost a decade since I’ve read up on the whole breastfeeding scene. What amazes me is that with all the time that has passed the lack of understanding that is still out there.
With as big as the Organic craze has gotten you have people who will shop at the natural foods store while pregnant, so baby has the best, but still have no qualms about giving their baby a bottle of formula. It doesn’t make any sense to me.
Not only does it show a lack of understanding of the supply and demand nature of breastfeeding, but if organics are good enough for your unborn baby and yourself why isn’t it good enough once the baby is born? After all what is more organic than breastmilk? Human milk for human babies.
Yes, yes… “babies do just fine on formula,” but breastfed babies do so much better. It’s the optimum best you can give your baby. Who actually does the optimum and best these days? They say formula is good enough. No it’s not! Saying breastfed babies do better is saying Formula is the norm and breastfeeding is better. (See my rant: Breast is Norm – Bottle is inferior for list of reasons.)
We need to reset our meters as to what is normal. What is organic? What is the God given and natural way to feed a baby? How were babies fed before formula? Why Breast of course. Which means that Formula fed babies aren’t as healthy as breastfed ones. Formula fed babies have more problems than breastfed babies. Formula fed babies aren’t as smart as breastfed babies.
What if you can’t? From what I’ve seen over the past 10 years is that only a very small amount of women can’t breastfeed given the proper knowledge and support. I’ve seen women overcome amazing obstacles to breastfeed.
If you really are in that minority of those truly unable to breastfeed, then that is what Formula should be for. To feed babies who aren’t able to get breastmilk who would otherwise starve. It should be a substitute for when the natural process doesn’t work. It should NOT be the default choice.
My Pregnancy and Early Parenting page has some more links for Breastfeeding info.
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Monday, July 7th, 2008
Cases of Kill the Messenger:
I don’t like the message. Ignore the message. Kill the messenger.
I don’t like the messenger. Who cares about the message. Kill the messenger.
I like the message, but don’t like the messenger. Miss all further messages. Kill the messenger.
I like the message and this messenger best. Accept only these messages. Kill all other messengers.
I like this messenger. Who cares what the message is. Kill all other messengers.
Which category do you fall under?
There is of course the option to take the message as delivered. Study the merits of the message yourself. And who cares how tall or short the messenger is. What color clothing he is wearing. His shoe size. His tone of voice or eye color. After all, he is just the messenger…
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Friday, May 16th, 2008
The more I am around (the majority of) women the more I prefer the company of men. What do I mean by that? Most men. Those that have not been feminized by public schools, psychology, medication, overbearing mothers or controlling wives:
They say what they mean and mean what they say.
They don’t drop hints or expect you to read their minds. They say what they expect or want.
They don’t read extra meaning into the words you say. They accept them at face value.
They don’t get upset or offended just because someone holds a view contrary to their own. They don’t get angry just because you defend that view to them.
They don’t walk into a room, look every man over, and make sure they are the better dressed and better looking male in the room…and if they aren’t make sure their wife never leaves their side.
As far as I know, and I’ve been the only female in the group a lot of times, they don’t sit around eating chocolate and bashing the women in their lives.
And when you ask them if something is wrong and they say, “Nothing.” They really mean NOTHING is wrong…
Women on the other hand:
Say things they really don’t mean. To be nice or mean.
They drop hints or expect men to read their minds. Then get upset when they do/get the wrong thing.
They read “hidden” agendas and remarks into anything and everything.
Get very offended if someone thinks things other than they do because that has to mean they think they are doing wrong. (Notice a trend of circular thinking here?)
They walk into a room and size up the competition.
I have never understood the habit of bonding over husband/men-in-general bashing that women do…
And when you ask a them if something is wrong and they say, “Nothing.” you had better be prepared to do some major grovelling or sleep in the dog house…
Now I am a woman and I’m not saying I’m perfect at avoiding these female tendencies or that men are without faults, but men are much more enjoyable for me to deal with. I know where I stand with them. I never know where I stand with another woman. And that can change from moment to moment anyway…
I find most women don’t like me. If you’ve read this far you’re probably thinking did you expect them to?
I could care less about fashion, weddings, jewelry, and who is dating whom.
I share interests with men that upset many of them: Computers, games, cars, guns, knives, and Sci-Fi.
And probably the main one that tends to be the kicker is I am a Biblical wife. (See th end of my post for a listing of verses.) My husband is the head of our home. It is my duty to honour, respect, obey, and love my husband. His word is law and final in our home. I believe this to be our God given role and I perform my duty willingly to the utmost of my ability. For some reason this seems to irritate, irk, offend and make many women quite hostile to me.
A lot of wives want their husbands to love them. Work. Provide. Care. Share. Give of themselves like they are called to do. However when it comes to that submission thing…any excuse will do.
Our Duty as Christian wives to our husbands.
To love and obey them:
Titus 2:4-5 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.
To reverence them:
Ephesians 5:33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
To be subject unto them:
Ephesians 5:22-23 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
Colossians 3:18-19 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.
1 Peter 3:1-2 Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
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Sunday, May 11th, 2008
To my mother who is a Biblical example of what a Mother should be.
Proverbs 31:28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.
Titus 2:4-5 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.
To my mother-in-law who gave birth to the child that grew up to be my amazing and wonderful husband.
To my many friends (and other women) who have adopted or are waiting to adopt.
To the foster mothers who love and care for children between homes.
To the birth mothers who love their child enough to give him/her up so he/she can be raised in a loving and stable two parent family.
To the mothers who are pregnant on this day.
To the mothers who are, “My kid’s Mom.”
To the ”mothers” that “mother” the children of others.
To the widower being both Father and Mother to his child(ren).
To those for whom this day also brings sadness-
The mother who is waiting to miscarry.
The mother who has miscarried.
The mother who has lost a child at any age.
The women who are grieving a lost mother.
And to the many, many women who greet this day with empty arms and aching hearts.
Happy Mother’s Day.
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Saturday, May 10th, 2008
My husband just wrote a great article I just had to share.
College: Who needs it?
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education. – Mark Twain
Every man should have a college education in order to show him how little the thing is really worth. – Ralph Waldo Emerson
Posted in Homeschooling, Parenting, Reviews | Comments Off
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